


Nuts

by WikdSushi



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Dwarf & Hobbit Cultural Differences, Dwarf Courting, Hobbit Courting, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-16
Updated: 2017-10-16
Packaged: 2019-01-18 09:53:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12385800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WikdSushi/pseuds/WikdSushi
Summary: Thorin has something to ask Bilbo.  Unfortunately, Bilbo has been talking with the others, and things go a little off course.





	Nuts

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to Seashadows for second reading!

As soon as they got out of sight of the others (even Nori), under the shadow of Beorn's ancient walnut trees, Thorin slipped his hand around the crook of Bilbo's elbow. Bilbo looked down. Thorin's stomach tightened; he suspected he ought to have stuck to shouting and sullen silences.

"Are you dizzy, Thorin?"

"Erm." Thorin cleared his throat. "No."

"Tired?"

"Not especially."

"If you need a wee, I'll turn my---"

"May I court you?"

Bilbo stopped. Not only walking, but breathing; looking about for rogue Fílis and Kílis; possibly even living for a moment as his eyes grew wide and his gaze blank. He turned his head in a series of small jerks and looked Thorin in the face. Thorin took a breath to apologize.

And Bilbo laughed. Despite the honest joy in it, Thorin felt his heart wither and fall away in shards.

"Oh, you clever jokester, you!" Bilbo squeezed Thorin's hand with his far hand. "You had me going there for a moment."

"I wasn't joking, Master Baggins. However, if you wish, I shall take that as your refusal---"

"Thorin!" Bilbo caught him with both hands before Thorin could get more than a step. "You.... I.... Hang on a...."

Thorin folded his arms and waited. Whatever Bilbo was going to say, it had best be quick, and had best be good. A fellow could only take so much heartbreak.

Bilbo went still and took a deep breath. He looked at Thorin like a curious bird. His hands flew to his mouth. "Oh, god. You really mean it. Oh, Thorin, I am so sorry."

"You're not the only one."

"Please don't say that. You surprised me." Bilbo laid his hand atop Thorin's arm. "Only, Balin said Dwarves court through matchmakers, and---"

"Why are you discussing courtship with Balin?"

"I was curious! What do you think, I've got the springtime saunters for him?"

"The what?"

"You know, the springtime saunters! A hop in one's step! The fidgets!"

"You mean a raging stand and no-one to play with it." Really. Hobbits.

A flush filled Bilbo's cheeks, and he shuffled his feet. "That's a bit crude, don't you think?"

"Truer than anything you said." Thorin glowered at his boots, willing their steel caps to burst into flames and melt. "Why did you react the way you did when I asked you...?"

"I thought you were joking!"

"You said I surprised you. Were you working out a way to let me down?"

"Actually," and Bilbo stuck his hands on his hips, "I didn't expect it. You're a by-the-Green-Ladies king! One would think it a bit beneath you to, you know. Want to court a Hobbit. Never mind a Baggins."

As Thorin watched, Bilbo pursed his mouth. Glared at the ground. Kicked a green walnut fallen from its branch. Muttered, "Any number of Dwarven lasses would don Elvish gowns to catch your eye."

"Why do you think they would go to the trouble when nothing ever worked before?"

Bilbo glanced up in shock. "What?"

"They've tried. Their families have tried. Their matchmakers have tried. At least my sister knew better the moment I named Fíli my heir before he was out of the womb. Not so many know I'm a...."

"Lad fancier?"

Thorin swallowed. "A Hobbit fancier, more like. It's one reason I didn't want you coming. I feared you might distract me."

Bilbo huffed, nearly a dry laugh. "As if I could."

Thorin shut his eyes a long moment, and looked right at Bilbo. "You've distracted me for longer than I care to say."

"I'm sorry."

"I'm not, Bilbo. You've saved us all more than once. And I'd still like to court you, if you finally believe I'm serious."

"I...." Bilbo fidgeted with his sorry neckerchief. "Goodness, Thorin. I wouldn't know how to start." He glanced up, a mere flicker of his eyes. "Not to say I wouldn't, well, enjoy learning."

"You are a difficult fellow to get a straight answer from. Do you need to sleep on it?" Like the quest itself. Maybe if Thorin sang his proposal, he'd have a better reception.

Bilbo took his hand and pulled him deeper into the walnut grove. "How did you even learn you fancy Hobbits? It's an odd taste to have, unless you're a Hobbit to start with."

Thorin smirked, though it spread into a smile. "I've known Hobbits before. The old thain, Ferumbras, and I grew to be more friends than associates. I'm enough of a king to form alliances with local leaders, you know."

"Ferumbras the Second?"

"Certainly not the first."

Bilbo grinned. It made his eyes shine in the late afternoon sunlight slanting through the trees above. Thorin caught his breath at how plain and lovely it made him--a contradiction, just like all others inside him. He hesitated only long enough to silence his reserve, and lifted Bilbo's hand to rest against his lips.

A great blush flooded Bilbo's face. He coughed, but held firm at Thorin's side, neither drew back nor pressed for affections. The corner of his mouth quirked, and he looked at Thorin from the corner of his eye.

"Ferumbras was my great-great grandfather."

"Really." It should have come as no surprise. Bilbo came from wealth, and had even brought a pouch of gold coin alongside his meager supplies. "So you are a duke? Perhaps an earl? Nobility, certainly."

"Hmph. I'm nothing but a thain's grandson. Gerontius, I mean."

"Old Gerontius. There was an eccentric fellow." Thorin chuckled, thinking back to a strange series of invitations, only a couple of which he had been able to accept. "He invited me to his children's weddings, you know. I only managed to attend for a daughter and one son."

"Which daughter?"

"Erm. Mirabella, I think."

"Ah." Bilbo drooped. He shook his head. "I'd hoped you would say Belladonna. My mother."

Thorin squeezed Bilbo's hand. "I'm afraid not, though I did meet her once in her youth. I should have seen the resemblance. You have her fire. And her mouth."

Bilbo laughed. "I got in trouble plenty for that mouth!"

"It suits you."

"What, trouble?" Bilbo grinned up at him. "So tell me, how does a king court someone?"

Thorin went light inside, as though he might float all the way to Erebor. He laced his fingers with Bilbo's, both hands. "First, we would need a chaperon. A king is a Dwarf, just like any other."

"Ah, well, that won't do. We are grown, after all, and grown Hobbits court very much on their own, at least most of the time." Bilbo paused, scowling in thought. "I expect I ought to use Beorn's kitchen tonight. I'll die before I skip the baking."

"Please don't die." The memory of Bilbo lost within Goblin Town felt far too near. "I couldn't bear it."

Bilbo opened his mouth, but swallowed whatever he was going to say. Thorin could not bring himself to move as Bilbo lifted himself onto his toes and pressed his cheek to Thorin's.

"I'm going nowhere," he said in Thorin's ear.

A shiver took Thorin's body, all the way to the bottoms of his boots. Bilbo tugged him to a walnut tree with a trunk like a mountain. Bilbo kicked away some fallen nuts and sat on the good, fresh earth, and waited until Thorin joined him.

"Another adventure already, Thorin. Goodness."

Thorin smiled. He leaned against the tree and, resting one hand atop Bilbo's, gazed east. Bilbo's warmth against his side made Erebor feel closer and stronger than ever before.


End file.
